Embracing the Worthiness of Being a Girl
I recently completed 9 Days of Navratri Sadhana, a profound process of purification and self-discovery. During this journey, I confronted a deep-seated feeling of unworthiness, stemming from the belief that I was never enough simply because I was born a girl.
My mother's words from the past echoed in my mind – she once expressed a wish for a son when she was pregnant with me. I carried the weight of feeling unwanted, of shame, and of insignificance simply for existing. This narrative wasn't unique to my family; it ran deep through our lineage.
My mother's own story was a testament to this painful legacy. She was nearly given away because she was a girl, the third girl in her family. Illness spared her from that fate, but her younger sister was not as fortunate. I can only imagine the guilt she bore, thinking it should have been her instead.
This narrative, I believe, is one shared by countless families, and it forms a collective wound that we all carry. As I embarked on my journey of healing, a mandala of Purity emerged, a symbol of respect and love for the little girl within me who never felt truly loved or appreciated.
I decided to pen a few words for this inner child:
"I am so sorry I have forgotten you
You sought love and acceptance from others because I failed to give it to you
You endured gaslighting and disrespect from others because I neglected to acknowledge you.
You shrank yourself to fit in, fearing rejection, because I forgot to accept you as you are.
You are a Divine Child of God, with a heart of purity and innocence.
You are a creation of God, perfect just the way you are.
You deserve the love that you never received from me, your beloved self.
I am so sorry I have forgotten you but I will not forget you again.
I love you"
Through this mandala of Purity, featuring Goddess Sri Bala Tripura Sundari, the Supremely Beautiful Child Goddess of the Three Worlds, may we all remember the Goddess Sri Bala within us.
Do these experiences resonate with you too?
Remember, you are not alone in your struggles. Embrace your inner child with love and acceptance, just as you are, and may your path lead you to the Goddess Sri Bala within.
Comments